Day 0 - Already fapped twice today

Good evening Bloggers, thank you for even reading this far into my trek of desparate renovation. Let's just say: I have a weird fetish. Weird enough that exacting such a fetish would land me in prison for a long time.  If my family ever realized it, I'd probably kill myself or become a serious drug addict. It might very well be hereditary in this fucked up family to have odd and dangerous sexual desires, but who fucking cares? This is about my pseudo-journey to explore the world before I turned 12, the world without masturbation.

I have fapped literally every day since November of that very day of that very month of that very year. I realize that masturbation is very normal and healthy, but for people like me, it has to stop. Everyday, I shamefully search up on Google Images my odd fetish and release my load. I fear everyday that my ISP might be logging my internet usage, my searches, or even the keys I type. This constant paranoia has to stop now. I've tried to stop at least 20 times before, but now I am determined. If this blog receives a certain number of views, I will maintain this trek and post a daily update of how I'm doing.

I'm sure my body will lash out on me in the most uncomfortable ways, but I'm ready to handle the consequences which will hopefully make me less dependent on that daily fap and stop feeling so ashamed. Wish me luck, guys, I'm certain I'll need it.